Monday, September 19, 2011

Top 10 TV Shows

Lets do this! Lets make today better by talking about something we ALL love...and if you don't love it...then i am not sure this thing between us is going to work out. That's awkward...i am sorry. That is just how it goes. 

Lets talk...lets just do this! I love TV...there...I said it! I laid my cards on the table...your turn! What do you love? Think about it. Think hard. There must be something?!

Well today i shall be telling you about my love for TV and how i just don't have a life when all the shows i love come back to town. I wait for them...i think about them...sometimes i dream about them. Good dreams. Dreams that rock my socks, but lets not get too excited. Don't make me tell you to shut up! Because i will! (Something about me...when excited...i WILL tell you to shut up. Just go with's not because i hate what you are telling me...i love it. It makes me squeal and jump around. I might pull a muscle or lose my voice. So shut up.) 

Oh man oh man! Today is the day! We are doing this! List makin' time! Yes, sir! Here it cooooomes!

My Top 10 TV Shows.
(BOOM, nailed it)

10. Cops - Fuck. YES. Nothing else compares to Cops. Don't give me Campus PD...i will throw that back in your face! Cops is awesome, it has many life lessons. For example...
* Don't run. They will taser you. 
* Don't try and swallow your drug stash. They will get it by an means necessary.
* Don't put you drug needles up your bum. They will make you squat them out.  
* Don't pick up a hooker. They know you ain't taking that bitch to the store. 
Life lessons. We all need to know this. Learn from this. Learn from their mistakes. Watch Cops. It's educational. AND well funny. 

9.  I Love Lucy - YES! Amazing. Lucille Ball...what a ball she was...HAYOO...yeah. I just did that. Not only is this show super funny, but it will make you feel like a 50's house wife. I know i do. I sit there watching this black and white...thinking of the yester years. Lucille would have been a 100 years old by now! What a gal! Lucy and her funny husband, Ricky...his accent was quite makes you listen, they are too sweet together...He tolerates Lucy's crazy antics. By far a better man then me. I would divorce that bitch. I KID! i love her!? Then their wonderful friends Fred and Ethel...always getting in to mischief. Those guys! Watch it for care free viewing! 

8. Sex & The City - Wonderful lady fun. Awkward at times, but they are just keeping you on your toes! If your parents are like mine they will walk in whilst the sex scenes are on and assume you are watching classy porn. Think that if they may...but this classy porn has a pretty good story line...filled with men, sex, shoes, and well...that's about it. It is a show i watch whilst feeling girly. Light the candles...get your box of chocolates whilst wearing your silk night gown and fluffy slippers...shove on Sex & The City. You are such a girl! 

7. Come Dine With Me - Dam i miss this show. American's weren't feeling the whole 'Lets cook dinner for each other throughout the week and judge each other' I don't get why...American's love to judge...we all do!  Hey! What's your deal BBC America! Bring back Come Dine With Me! Such a good show! 
People think they are super amazing at cooking...most of the time they are super shit...and each guest (about 4-5 guests) has their night too cook. Then the other quests have to judge them and then the winner gets 1000 pounds! What is not too love! Food and drama and people trying to be nice. Great show. 

6. Hell's Kitchen - Yep. Gordon Ramsey rocks my world. He doesn't know it yet...but we are defiantly getting married one day. Back to the show...Hell's Kitchen is awesome. 2 teams go up against each other in a restaurant, what ever team cooks the best, or doesn't get thrown out of the kitchen (which happens often) wins. The losing team have to vote for people they want to leave...Gordon decides who goes...and it just goes on like that until 1 person is the winner of Hell's Kitchen! Woo! Tonight is the final...shits gonna get crazy! 2 hour special...lets get excited! YEAHH! SO don't call me. 

5. Kitchen Nightmares - Oh hello again Mr. Ramsey! Someone might think i like you or something...well they would be right. I do. Kitchen nightmare makes me nervous to eat out now a days. This show will take you into shitty kitchens and show you bad, off date foods crazy 'chefs' cook with. BUT THEN this handsome fella comes to the rescue and shouts and swears at them...teaching them tough love...teaching them how too cook and re decorates their horrible restaurant. What a great man. Sometimes this show will pull at your heart's ok to cry. Let it out...their restaurant is beautiful now...those are happy tears you are crying. Good for you. 

4. South Park - Boom! LOVE IT! South Park makes it ok for children to swear and turn mean people's parents in to chili...then you isn't ok to do. Don't do that. The South Park kids can do it because they aren't real and Cartman is a crazy big boned bitch. Butter's has stolen my heart though...what a little fella. He is too sweet for his own good...YES i know it's pretend! Whatever! I can want him as my child though!? South Park...we have grown up together. We love each other. Don't ever stop. Never ever. 

3. Family Guy - This show just keeps getting funnier. Season 1 is has that strange voice for Meg...i can't get passed it. Now though it is the bees knees. I love the Star Wars episodes...too funny! Not seen them yet? Then please do...We can't talk to each other until you have seen those are missing out and i...i just can't look at you right now. Stewie is still...kind of trying to kill Louis, Meg and Chris made out, Brian still loves the ladies...and his voice is sexy...i said it! You were thinking it! Peter is just a big ball of funny. Family Guy. What a great show! Just great! PLUS you can quote it all the time and it is ALWAYS appropriate to do so. 

2. The Office (American) - The American version is by far funnier...for me that like what ever Office! Micheal Scott will be missed...we still have re runs, that we do. He can't leave us in those...unless you watch the one where he leaves to be with the love of his life. How selfish of him. How dare he leave! So now we have no idea who the new manager will be...until Thursday! Hell yeah! Thursday Baby! Well, i think Thursday...get back to you! But i have been given STRICT rules not to ruin anything for my Faye...i don't want to be that person...unless she asks of course then i will be more then happy to spill the deets. I miss seeing, Jim, Pam, Dwight, oh who am i kidding! I miss them all, i can't wait for then to come back in to our lives! The Office! Woop WOOP!! 

1. Modern Family - Thank you...Thank you Faye for introducing me to Modern Family. (and The Office) Good lord...what would we have done without Modern Family to quote none stop. I wanna be like Claire and married to a Phil like character with children just like Haley, Alex & Luke.  Those Dunphy's are the best. Gloria is too funny...and too gorgeous. Such a bitch. I kid! I am just jealous. Jay, i just love him! Manny...what a funny little fella! Mitchell and Cameron make me smile and their baby, Lily is far too cute...i want her. All in all it is the funniest show ever. Everyone is funny, everyone is sweet and you instantly love them. I really could quote them all day long...i probably will be soon. Wednesday!!! Fuck yes! I can't wait!!! 

So there we go...there are more...we have a whole bunch of new shows coming this Fall. Blows my mind. Goodbye social life, goodbye fresh air. See you winter time...that works out just fine for me though...i am not one for heat. Texas has far too much heat for me. Yuck heat.

Today has been quite a day. So i must be off to watch Hell's Kitchen. I have my blanket, my pups and my low fat popcorn! SO READY! Hello Gordon Ramsey. SHUT UP! 

Geeez i love you guys! 

Peace, Love & Kara <3  

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